Tumblr Archive

@damazcuz: There needs to be 400 hours in the day so I have more time to do fuck all

@mymarifae:

@greelin: how the hell do people work full time AND work out. and also eat. i feel like a dvd player

@garaks-padded-bra: forgot my night time garlic bread in the oven for the length of 2 mythbusters wpisodes and when i opened the oven door it was so thoroughly cremated that i was blinded not by smoke and ash but what surely must have been its Soul as well

Anonymous asked: do you respect the grind?

@lordgolden answered: there is nothing I disrespect more than the grind

@louisegluckpdf: in your 20s you must rediscover the joys of arts and crafts to stave off spiritual decay

@twerklina:

@xvisualtreasure09x:

@magecock: This looks like roller coaster tycoon

@biggyman: Fallout 2 modded

@identifying-cars-in-posts: 1996-1999 Ford Taurus

@mostly-funnytwittertweets:

@kaijuno:

@cypheramnesia: Successfully located the fifth corner of the bed sheets.

@cypheramnesia: Why do I keep finding more corners.

@cypheramnesia: My bed sheets are a Mandelbrot set

@vaguewizard: I call forth.. my CREATURES
A rift opens up, revealing these

@greelin: am going to be thinking “lindt chocolate beast” on a loop for the next 5-10 business days

@greelin:

@play-now-my-lord:
7-11 CLERK: lovely day outside, isn't it
ME: uhhh
ME INTERNALLY: shit. I didn't notice. How do I continue this conversation
MY INNER MONOLOGUE: Service workers love it when you tell them the things mortal men were not meant to know, when you speak to them of principalities and powers upon the earth
ME: In the sun a wheel, in the wheel another wheel. Do you see?
7-11 CLERK: Yes, I see!
ME: For each turn of the outer wheel, one thousandth a turn of the inner wheel. And within the inner wheel a point of perfect darkness
7-11 CLERK: Right, growing, devouring. The death of all light
ME: Wanes the light - right - wanes the light and waxes the solar eye. Wanes the day of flesh and blood and waxes the night of crawling beasts. Chewing and swallowing. The name of the night to come is khoshek ha-gibbor
7-11 CLERK: Is that hot dog a quarter pound big bite or a spicy bite. They're priced different
ME: Which one is cheaper

@jesusinstilettos: God is the sun and I am an earthworm baking on the hot pavement.